如何帮助朋友

At times you may wonder how to help a friend who is in distress. In most instances communicating your concern and then listening to your friend in a non-judgmental and supportive way is the best help you can provide.

At times, however, a friend's problems are more serious and this approach may not be enough. If any of the following apply, encourage your friend get professional help:

如果你的朋友……

总是处于某种痛苦之中
… rarely seems to feel better for more than a little while
是与家人或亲密朋友隔绝
不再照顾自己
… is using an excessive amount of alcohol or other drugs
… seems to be ruining close relationships with others
… severely restricts calories, exercises excessively or binges/purges
… feels desperate or hopeless that things will change
… talks about wanting to hurt him/herself or hurt someone else
… has problems that are starting to feel overwhelming to YOU

在这些情况下，可能有助于:

告诉你的朋友你的担忧. Say that you've noticed that they are in a lot of distress and ask what you can do to help. Avoid judgmental or provocative statements and instead focus on the facts (e.g.., “You aren't coming to class much and you seem really down all of the time,” “Some of us have noticed that you aren’t around much and we’re worried about you”).
Ask if your friend has considered talking to a professional counselor. Give your friend information about the Student Counseling Service and, 如果你愿意的话, offer to accompany them to the first appointment.
Talk confidentially with a member of the Campus Awareness and Risk Evaluation team. If your friend's problems seem severe or you are worried that they might hurt themselves or someone else, 寻求帮助! 这个委员会可以和学生见面, 帮助确定行动方针, and coordinate with other campus offices to assist the student.

In spite of your best efforts, sometimes friends just won't be receptive to your suggestions. In those cases it can be helpful to remind your friend that you are there if needed and then to respect your friend's wish not to get help. A major exception to this is when a friend has talked about wanting to hurt or kill him/herself or someone else. In these cases it is imperative that you get your friend help.

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帮助有自杀倾向的朋友

People who are thinking about killing themselves may communicate this in some way to close friends or family. They may talk directly about their plans or talk indirectly about feeling that life is unbearable and that there is no solution to their difficulties. You should take such statements seriously and not assume that the person is only temporarily upset or that the situation will resolve itself.
如果你怀疑朋友有自杀倾向:

直接询问自杀. 尽可能保持冷静. Ask, "Are you thinking about killing yourself?" Ask if your friend has a specific suicide plan. Remember that some suicidal people do not have an immediate plan but still need help.
不要试图独自处理这种情况. If you believe that your friend is going to harm themselves, do not leave them alone. Contact someone who can help you and your friend in this situation. 选项包括:
公共安全热线464-4000(每日24小时)
CONTACT24-hour crisis hotline at 315 251-0600
You also can call 911 or take your friend to the nearest emergency room.
Your Resident Assistant or close friends/family members.
学生咨询服务，电话464-3138
你不需要当警探. It is not up to you to figure out whether your friend is serious about suicide. Always take signs of suicide seriously and get help.
是不带评判性的. 现在不是讨论道德问题的时候, challenge the validity of the person's experience or try to make them feel guilty about their feelings. Encourage your friend to consider other options and to make a specific plan for how to get help.
你不发誓保守秘密吗. Your friend may open up to you and then ask you not to tell anyone else. This isn't fair to you and it isn't safe for your friend. It is better to risk your friend's anger than to take chances. Don't promise to keep secrets, but do promise to help the person in whatever way you can
表达你的关心. Reassure your friend that even though life feels overwhelming, 有很多方法可以克服这些感觉. Let your friend know that you have hope for their future and that you will be there to help.
Give your friend the phone number for 24-hour crisis resources, such as Contact (315-251-0600) or the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline (800-273-8255).
你也要好好照顾自己. Helping a friend in distress can be frightening, exhausting, and frustrating. Get support from someone close to you or from a professional counselor.

If you are uncomfortable talking directly with your friend or feel uncertain about what you should do, 与你信任的人交谈. You also can contact Student Counseling at 464-3138 to discuss your concerns.

其他资源

全国预防自杀生命线
1 - 800 - 273 - talk (8255)

美国自杀预防基金会
http://afsp.org/

分号项目
http://projectsemicolon.com/about-project-semicolon/

危机短信热线
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